Humor

To The Classified Ads Manager

An open letter

Image by mohamed Hassan from Pixabay

Dear Classified Ads Manager,

I’d like to place the following ad for your next scheduled publication.

Work Husband Wanted

Supportive wife without the drama. Okay, no face-to-face drama. Basically need someone to chat about the day we’ve both had. We can do it every evening over dinner. Perfect setup. No overhead as Zoom is a free date. We buy our own wine and dinner. How great is that?!

Must listen to family crap, which is minimal, and “work” crap quite a bit (and if you don’t think functioning as an editor while retired is a lot of crap and a lot of work, you need not apply!).

Talking about the weather is optional. Yes, I will listen to whatever is on your mind. Just keep it in a conversational tone that won’t make me barf up my chicken caesar salad. This is non-negotiable.

/end

Thank you, Mr./Ms. Classified Ads person. I’d like to thank you for your ability to withhold any judgment you may have. But I can’t until I see the ad in print.

Regards,

I’m Tired of Paying for a Therapist