My Open Letter to Publishers
It’s not me. It’s not you. It’s the platform.
--
This is a half-assed attempt and being serious and funny at the same time. I read a piece by my little brother FHno1(Dude, stop changing your ID!!) aka Jason P. who runs Fuck Niches. He explained the behind-the-scenes goings on of the publishing world on Medium. You can read his open letter to us, his dedicated Fuck Heads here.
I remember the not-so-good old days of publishing here on Medium. It was a fucking nightmare frankly. For all the reasons JP stated and more. I published for a pub on here that pushed out (and still does) 100s of posts per day. I alone did on average 100 and there were many other editors pushing out what they could too (maybe 20 each). So that’s a huge queue, a lot of writers to contend with, and each has their own expectations and attitudes about what editors should do and what we actually do.
With that said…
I’m one of those asshats that will pull a piece after it’s been submitted.
Dear Santa, I can explain… (my favorite t-shirt of all time.)
And this isn’t just for JP but all the publications that I publish with including the next two that I hope to added as a writer for by this time next week. It would help if I submitted a draft. I know, I know.
Time Zones
I literally have no idea where in the world people are. But I do know from writing here for over two years that my sweet spot to get eyeballs is 9 am EST Monday through Friday. I have at times left a PN for editors/publishers that it’s my preference. I want to make that 🫰just like most others on here. I have to give my readers what they want and that seems to be their preference.
But when I ask for that I feel like I’m being a diva or expecting princess-like attention. Although I am a Duchess by blood I try not to pull that card unless I have to. So if I don’t know that a piece has been scheduled (more about that in a minute) and it’s after 9 am EST, I’ll pull it and self-publish. I’m trying to catch all of those morning commuters that need something to read while they’re on the bus or train. Or at least that’s the picture in my head having lived in the DMV for over 20 years.
Scheduling
I have looked and looked and if there’s a place that shows me a piece has been scheduled by a publisher can someone drop me a comment so I will know. I never know a piece is set to go until after I pull it and then it shows me the date and time it was set for. Bassackwards for sure. There should be a pop-up window or something that says, “Are you sure you want to remove this as it has been scheduled to publish on xyz date at xyz time?” or words to that effect.
Workload and Personal Life
Not mine as my workload is what I make it and what personal life? Doctor appointments and ER visits are hardly a life but I digress.
However, publishers and editors have jobs. Or are looking for jobs. Have spouses. Kids, Play dates for kids. Sick kids. Sick spouses. Parents. Inlaws. Lawns to cut. Groceries to buy. You know. The same shit you and I have to do.
So I feel guilty if I’m asking for special favors. That too will be a reason why I’ll pull and self-publish. I get how tiring working and yes, it’s work, for free can be.
And yes, I’m self-publishing this just after 9 am because I too have a life which this morning included getting yet another load from the storage unit, hitting the arches for my morning usual, Walmart for a few kitchen items, and then back here to unload everything and put it away!
I had a third point but I’ve run out of steam at this point but you get my drift. Nothing I do, I can’t speak for anyone else, is personal. It’s just me trying to keep readers happy without being a royal (see what I did there?) pain in the ass to publications.
So for all of your publishers out there that read this, lemme know in the comment section if you’re okay with my self-publishing at 9 am my time and then you publish whenever is good for you.
Cool?
CC:
Share Your Creativity
The Orange Journal
Dr. Funny
Crow’s Feet
