Member-only story
The Reason I Cried Today
It took long enough
- I learned last week that the Pentagon was burning 9/11 debris in their parking lot, 20 minutes from where I was living at the time.
- I worked on that disaster and many others in the nearly 10 years I did disaster response and recovery for the feds.
- I haven’t been able to work since May 2018. I was only 55.
I just got back from cardiology. BP is 99/56. He found me lying down on the exam table curled up with my eyes closed. I’ve been sleeping with the heating pad on 9 at night to keep from freezing. It’s August in case I have to remind anyone. He said a few more days of this and my body should be adapted to the medication. God, I hope so. I’m actually ordering an electric blanket when I finish this piece.
Weak in the knees. Feel like my knees are going to buckle under me. I took a shower, half-ass made the bed, and rolled 5 minutes up to Walmart to pick up 8 items and had to take a nap when I got back. This is bullshit and no way to live. Hell, it isn’t living. It’s barely existing.
My hair is falling out because of my thyroid but Endocrinology won’t change my meds. I think Cardiology is going to do a peer-to-peer call with her and see WTF is up with her. I told him to feel free to put his foot in her ass if he thought it would do any good…
